How to make your kid CLEAN UP after play...

After leaving comments in this post, reached home I get this…

When is time to clear up, I gave them a plastic bag each and told them “Let’s have some fun! Let’s see today who can keep more Alphas & numbers in her plastic bag.”
Without screaming, they started to clear the mess.

Within few seconds….tada…All Done!

Try turn the clean up session into a competition and you will be surprise to see the pride on your kid when he/she keep more than his/her counterpart! Look at my 2 girls and you will know what I mean.

Sometimes, we sing Barney’s Clean-Up song while we clean up. It goes like this…
Clean Up, Clean Up, Everybody Everywhere;
Clean Up, Clean Up, Everybody Do Your Share!
I will lead the song in progressive mode, start with slow tempo, then medium, then fast! Is fun!! Also within minutes, the space is cleared!

Sometimes, after much coax & nagging, if my 2 girls still don’t clean up. Then I will start picking up the toys & put in the storage box. After picking up few pieces, I will pretend I strain my back & start moaning: ouch here ouch there… (drama a bit lah). Then I will ask for help from my 2 darling! And they will do the rest. Little trick for great success!

Hope the above give you some idea dealing with your little ones when they refuse to clean up after the play session. Let me know whether it works for you!

Do U Shout at Ur Spouse?

I came across an article about Do you shout at Your spouse in front of Your kids this afternoon. I feel so bad after reading the post. Guess you should know the reason. Yes, I admit, I do it at times when my dearly husband just couldn't be bothered with my words. I know deep inside my heart that as a wife, we should honour our husband but sometimes I just can't keep cool when we are of different views over certain issues.

I don't really mean "shout" as the real shout but I do raise my voice. This is certainly bad. What have I done?? I am sending an indirect message to my kids to disrespect their father! There are times that my 2 girls blaming their daddy for things that happens. For instance, there are times they just leave their toys in a mess after playing it. When I asked them why they don't keep their toys after playing, they will point to the father and raise their voice to blame "Daddy lah". In my heart, I was like - What is it got to do with daddy?? Anyway, I will just turn to them & insisted that they should keep it clean. Sometimes when they are in the mood to clean, then they will do it, else they will just leave the mess for me & daddy to clean, you know things just happen....

I personally feel that we as parents shouldn't raise our voice in front of our kids at all times if we don't want our kids to do the same. After being a mum, I admitted I do change a lot. I am more organized & tidy as compared to when I was single (even thought there’s still lots of improvement room). I have more patience than ever. Most of the times I will think twice before a word come out from my mouth since this experience.

Good luck & Lets work hard together to make our parenting experience a terrific one!

To my beloved Lou Kong,

I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to you for raising my voice towards you at times. I sincerely seek forgiveness from you. I’m sorry & I love you. *Looking into your eyes*
I hope you will have time to read this post soon !

Am I pushing too hard?

Wah! Is like a knock on my head after reading this post... perhaps this is written for me... ;) Anyway, thanks for your sharing. This mummy is terrific/marvelous. I learn a lot from her without her knowing. Thanks & many thanks. You are just like my sifu (guru) in parenting. I am trying hard to turn my house to a Montessori home tooo…. But guess there’s still a long way to go!

Xuan just turn 4 last March. I don't know since when she can write, she can imitate quite well, I think she can imitate 70% of the Alpha both capital & small. Actually I don't know which alpha she can write as I don't track but my feeling is like she can write quite a lot. Xuan Xuan also can write from 0-7 of the numeric of cause sometimes she does mix it up, like 'b' write as 'd' for the numeric (the mirror effect kind of error) this happen to number 3 & 5. She picks up writing all by herself. I don't really sit down with her teaching her how to write, I don't have the patience, sadly to say!

I started her with writing her name (Xuan) only, when she was 3.5yo (I think) and that also upon her request. She always wants to write her name on whatever scribbles that are done by her. To me, Xuan's progress is terrific as she's only 4 & she can do so much. That is the main reason why I don't do serious homework with her. No question, me too is for kid learn best through play... tapi recently, I found Xuan is very lacking, she always want me to do craft with her. I hardly see her scribbles on alpha or numbers, but more on Monster drawing, will blog abt it soon. Worse is when I asked her whether is there any homework, she will straight away say “No” or “Can you please check on my beg?”. I was like “HAR???” *scratching on my head*

I started her with the 'homework concept' because I want to plant the seed of 'homework=her own responsibility' in her. I don't want to be like my own mom, every time has to take the rotan out to discipline her child for homework (that’s me), that one can really vomit blood, mannnn....

Xuan preschool is one of those ‘relax’ type. Even after 4 months of schooling, she only has 1 or most 2 pages of homework to do over the weekend. During weekday, no homework at all. I started Xuan with 'homework’ in the hope that she can be more responsible on her own work, of cause I don't expect perfect writing over the homework, but sometimes I purposely erase some of her work & make her redo.. Be it in school life, work life, we can't escape from rework/redo. That's the fact of life. This is because I want her to be ready with the ‘redo’ situation. If you have to rework, you have to rework, and please do to it with an open heart, and don’t blame. If you really don't want to redo, just do it right the first time, is just that simple.

To me, Parenting is the most difficult subject in my entire 32 years of life. Parenting is not all about growing an academic excellence child but is about growing a child who is equipped with good etiquette/moral/personality and whatever surviving skills that you can think of in order to survive in this increasingly challenging world. I would believe that you have the same thought as mine??

Need your parenting advice

I know I will have to write this down to seek for advice….

I can’t manage my little gal – Wen Wen (2 years old).
She is bold and aggressive and a lots of the time she is in control of a situation.
Whenever she can’t get thing done her way, she will throw tantrum. She will scream & cry & stamp her feet & becomes very aggressive.

For e.g. Yesterday night, we had a ‘water color’ session.



I drew a worm for Wen Wen to color. The darker color of her choice covers the worm’s eyes. Daddy try to draw back the eyes, this little thing agitated her. She started to scream at Daddy. She is mumbling while trying to cover back the eyes with her paint brush.



From there on she seems like very unhappy with her Daddy. When Daddy holds her toy, she rudely wanted to take it back. Daddy refused to give as he feels that we really need to teach Wen Wen the right way to get thing done.

Mummy: Wen Wen, ask nicely from daddy.
Wen Wen attempted to grab it even more aggressively.
Mummy: Wen say “Daddy, can I have my toy please”
Wen Wen started to cry and hit her daddy.
Mummy: Wen sayang daddy and say “Please”
Wen Wen: I don’t want daddy! (She is stamping her feet now)

When I told her to say “please”, she cried and kept saying “I don’t want daddy”.
This continues until daddy played the toy in different manner. Probably this distracted her, and she stopped crying. The moment daddy left the toy on the chair, she quickly ran to the chair & grabbed the toy & started to imitate how daddy played the toy. End of the day, there isn’t any “please” from Wen Wen and she still gets the toy.

I really don’t know how to teach her. Wen Wen is very selective, she only listen to whatever that she wants to listen. Unlike Xuan Xuan, she is very understanding, I don’t have to scream at her, hardly I punish her, she only needs explanation & she can follows instruction.

I’m having headache with my Wen Wen, any mommy have any suggestion to deal with stubborn kid??? Or perhaps I should say an extremely independent kid who has her own mind???